Mario

Hello everyone and welcome back to another blog post. You’ve beaten Onimusha: Way of the Sword. You’ve absorbed enough Genma souls to power a small nation. And now you’re sitting there, controller in hand, wondering what to do with your life. Congratulations. You’ve discovered the cruelest truth of the gaming industry: the games that hit hardest

Hello everyone and welcome back to another blog post. Year by year, she erases us. Every year, the Paintress wakes and paints a number on her monolith. Everyone that age turns to smoke and fades away. Tomorrow, she paints “33.” Tomorrow, we depart on our final mission—destroy the Paintress, so she can never paint death

Hello everyone and welcome back to another blog post. I have not played Insomniac’s Wolverine yet. But I have heard things. Whispers. The kind of whispers that make you instinctively check if your pre-order has shipped before you remember you did not pre-order. A Metascore that makes grown adults clutch their Spider-Man collector’s editions and

Let’s be honest: most “deep” games about climate change are about as subtle as a brick through a window. You get the heavy-handed metaphor, the guilt-trip soundtrack, the ending where the protagonist gives a speech about how we’re all doomed unless we recycle more. Congratulations, you’ve been educated. Please feel bad now. Umurangi Generation does

Let’s get one thing straight: you’re not getting any younger, and November 5th—the release date for the Ocarina of Time remake on Switch 2—is still an eternity away. You could spend the next two months staring at the pre-order screen, refreshing your email for a shipping notification that won’t come, or you could actually play

Hello everyone and welcome back to another blog post. Congratulations, humanity! We finally solved death. Turns out, the solution was just a monthly subscription fee, and if you miss a payment, they repossess your body while you’re still using it. Progress! In Nobody Wants to Die, the neo-noir detective thriller set in New York 2329,

Hello everyone and welcome back to another blog post. Alright, let’s cut the fluff. You’re here because your kid has either A) spent $50 on V-Bucks without asking, or B) is currently watching someone on YouTube play a game for three hours instead of actually playing one themselves. Well, put down the credit card and

Hello everyone and welcome back to another blog post. Let’s be honest. Most video games treat you like an adult who needs a 47-minute tutorial on how to open a door. They hand you a sword, a destiny, and a moral compass so heavy it could double as a paperweight. Then along comes Thank Goodness You’re

Hello everyone and welcome back to another blog post. Back for more indie recommendations, are we? Well, buckle up, buttercup, because we’re doing it again. This time, we’re hunting for the Holy Grail: indie games that scratch that very specific, morally questionable Grand Theft Auto itch. You know the feeling. That desperate urge to cause

A guide for people who hate the fishing mini-game but want the achievements Hello everyone and welcome back to another blog post. Let me guess. You bought Stardew Valley because you heard it was relaxing. You wanted to plant some parsnips, maybe pet a chicken, and live out your pastoral fantasy away from the soul-crushing